About this siteHere is where you will read the best collection of funny quotes. Discrimination is not good, so we did not leave anyone behind. You can read funny or simply stupid things said by writers, actors, comedians, singers, movie makers or anonymous quotes. And all of that because we believe that not taking life seriously is the number one attribute of people with a great sense of humor. Sit back and have a sip of fun.
Quote of The Day
„Note – The key to a good relationship is the key. Give me back the key.“
Other funny quotes
- What you call dog with no legs? Don’t matter what you call him, he ain’t gonna come.
- Do you know what it means to come home at night to a woman who’ll give you a little love, a little affection, a little tenderness? It means you’re in the wrong house.
- An optimist laughs to forget. A pessimist forgets to laugh.
- Don’t worry. Being eaten by a crocodile is just like going to sleep. In a giant blender.
- A line is a dot that went for a walk.
- Recession is when your neighbor loses his job. Depression is when you lose yours. And recovery is when Jimmy Carter loses his.
- My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a bitch.
- Son, if you really want something in this life, you have to work for it. Now quiet! They’re about to announce the lottery numbers.
- Where there’s a will, there are five hundred relatives.
- A lot of people are afraid of heights. Not me, I’m afraid of widths.