Category Archives: Funny quotes on life

What about your life? Read funny quotes on life.

Every murderer is probably somebody’s old friend.

Agatha Christie

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Trouble defies the law of gravity. It’s easier to pick up than to drop.

Johathan Raban

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Life is pleasant. Death is peaceful. It’s the transition that’s troublesome.

Issac Asimov

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Here’s to alcohol: the source of, and answer to, all of life’s problems.

Homer Simpson

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Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys.

P. J. ORourke

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Summer is the season when a man thinks he can cook better on an outdoor grill than his wife can on an indoor stove.

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I love to go to Washington – if only to be near my money.

Bob Hope

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I was in a bar the other night, hopping from barstool to barstool, trying to get lucky, but there wasn’t any gum under any of them.

Emo Phillips

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I have tried to know absolutely nothing about a great many things, and I have succeeded fairly well.

Robert Benchley

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I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.

Groucho Marx

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