Category Archives: Funny quotes about women

Funny quotes about women! Only about women.

You know the hardest thing about having cerebral palsy and being a woman It’s plucking your eyebrows. That’s how I originally got pierced ears.

Geri Jewell

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I have to be careful to get out before I become the grotesque caricature of a hatchet-faced woman with big knockers.

Jamie Lee Curtis

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We women don’t care too much about getting our pictures on money as long as we can get our hands on it.

Ivy Baker Priest

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Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea.

Robert A. Heinlein.

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Do you know what it means to come home at night to a woman who’ll give you a little love, a little affection, a little tenderness? It means you’re in the wrong house.

George Burns

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When you are courting a nice girl an hour seems like a second. When you sit on a red-hot cinder a second seems like an hour. That’s relativity.

Albert Einstein

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Marriage is when a man and woman become as one; the trouble starts when they try to decide which one.

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Before marriage, a man yearns for the woman he loves. After marriage, the ‘Y’ becomes silent.

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An archaeologist is the best husband a woman can have. The older she gets the more interested he is in her.

Agatha Christie

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Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy is the same.

Oscar Wilde

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