„First law on holes – when you’re in one, stop digging.“
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Other funny quotes
- Ah, good ol’ trustworthy beer. My love for you will never die.
- People always ask me, “Where were you when Kennedy was shot?” Well, I don’t have an alibi.
- Dogs have Owners, Cats have Staff
- Do you know what it means to come home at night to a woman who’ll give you a little love, a little affection, a little tenderness? It means you’re in the wrong house.
- I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it.
- I was in a bar the other night, hopping from barstool to barstool, trying to get lucky, but there wasn’t any gum under any of them.
- Men marry women with the hope they will never change. Women marry men with the hope they will change. Invaribly they are both disappointed.
- I don’t need you to remind me of my age. I have a bladder to do that for me.
- He who can does. He who cannot, teaches.
- I told my wife that a husband is like a fine wine; he gets better with age. The next day, she locked me in the cellar.